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Monday 24 June 2013

Guide to dating an Asian girl

Presenting the holy grail to getting an Asian girl:

1. Hitting on a girl - If you meet a hot Asian girl at the pub or club, do not show your half-baked Michael Jackson moves nor send the vibes like you are Rasputin. Instead, tell her the following exact phrase: "Can I go home to meet your mum to get her permission to kiss you?". Tested by 6 of my friends and only 1 failed. He was hitting on a chick with a son as old as me.

2. Topics - Do not try chatting up on Jacky Chan, Bruce Lee and showing off your weird kungfu kids to try turning us on. Coz we are simply not interested.

3. Body - If you have abs like a bar of chocolate, do show it off to us in a subtle way. We dig abs but not when you just walk up to us and do a hulk style ripping of your clothes.

4. Personality - We wish you were Tony Stark. But if we were to choose, humor and a cute smile will melt us.

5. Hairstyle - Justin Bieber? Christ sake, no. It would be better for you to put a mop over your head and at least I can turn you over to clean the mess after party. I and a few of my girls personally like short spiky hair.

6. Hobby - DOTA? League of Legends? Unless you are lucky to meet a gamer girl. Sports like rollerblading, reading at a cafe or catching a movie. We can always go back to partyinggg.

7. Gifts - Well which girl does not like Chanel or Prada? But we do like pleasant surprises once in a while that you do yourself e.g. cooking a meal, a hand-made gift

8. Culture - If you do date an Asian chick and attend a family function where you are the only non-Asian, have courtesy and try the food or at least put the food on your plate. Most of the family members are actually watching if you care to know her culture. If you do not like the cuisine, its time to make friends with her pet kitty who will help you with it.

Godspeed.

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